Hate the doctors

Daddy i hate when we go to the doctors sometimes. You are so broken after they tell you no change. We went in today to have a catscan and to get the results of your blood work. We heard those dreaded words NO CHANGE, it is so hard to see you broke like this. You say you know the chemo is what is keeping you alive mainly because the doctor has told you that if you go off the chemo you will die within a few months. I just keep wondering how many times can a person hear their is NO CHANGE i'm sorry maybe next month. I know, I feel broken after we hear that and yet I tell you in the middle of your tears that it is ok, that we will beats this , that you will beat this. Sometimes I believe me when I hear this other times I don't. It is so hard to see you this way. I thought it was hard seeing you loose your arm and all of the heart ache that came with that when I was 8. Nothing compares to seeing you go through this. Sometime I think How is he so strong? How can I help him? Then I remember what you told me when I was 8. No matter what happens as long as I have my family I will be fine. As long as I am their for you, you will be fine. I love you daddy and I will ALWAYS  be your little princess!