WALL and Dreams

Daddy- Last night I felt like I hit a wall. I just broke down. I was crying, then screaming, then crying. I felt like I hit a wall and it was like I had to let every out in order past. I screamed that it wasn't fair, that why didn't they catch the leukemia earlier, why did it take so long.I screamed just to scream to let it all out. I cried and cried about how strong you are and how sick your are. I cried because of how strong you act and then you break down and cry. I feel I needed to hit this wall and let it all out. I know the girls kinda thought it was weird to see mommy like that. I also cried because I use to dream about you being at Isis's wedding and her gradation and seeing your first great-grandchild born. Those dreams are no longer what I dream about. I dream about you beating this against all odds, about you seeing Aubree turn 1.It is amazing what a sickness can do to your dreams. I pray every night that you make it to Aubree's 1st birthday. I pray you go in and they say the cancer and now leukemia is gone. That they can't tell you how but it is gone. I love you Daddy and I will see you soon.